Hello 2009 It’s Good to Meet You
January 1, 2009, 12:03 am
Filed under: Blips, happiness, history, life, marriage, me

I’m not all that sad to see 2008 go. I usually have this awful sense of dread in the pit of my stomach when it’s time for the new year to roll in. A sense of loss and moving on, change. I don’t like change sometimes. But this year I’m waving it on out happy to see it go. It’s been a trying year. I was thinking today that I just feel like I’m running all the time. Trying to keep up, invent and establish myself. I want to give give give of me and I’m tired. I need to slow down, try again, not be so rushed. I can’t always keep up with it all and I know it but I try and try some more.

When the twins were small and I was trapped at home alot, just the three of us, I was actually bored.  Looking back now I kind of wish I had that problem now. And as I look back even further I can still see a glimpse of the girl that married too young for all the wrong reasons and it makes me feel all the more blessed that I was able to undo my mistake and find a better place for myself. I’m so fortunate to have a man that treats me like a human although he is difficult to live with at times it is nothing like ‘before’.  I have slowly forgotten what it feels like to tiptoe on glass all the time waiting for the next release of unwelcome anger. In the end I have come to a conclusion. I think before I was dreading what was to come judging what had been, but today on the last day of this year I think I am welcoming what is ahead. I feel as though I have a future worth looking forward to, a life that is so full my ‘cup has finally runneth over.’

So as we embrace 2009 I would like to thank the handful of friends who have been sticking it out with me. I am so glad to know you, I feel blessed to have met you. Even if we should never meet, I will hold you in my heart.


1 Comment so far
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I didn’t know that you had been in an abusive relationship before and how very brave of you to leave it.
I am so glad to know that you now, “have a future worth looking forward to”.
Happy New Year and hugs to you!

Comment by Merri

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