Pass the Nitrates Please
September 18, 2008, 10:30 pm
Filed under: cooking, help, life, me, parenting

natalie dee
nataliedee.com

I just opened an email from my mother, read it and moved on. But it was still tumbling around inside my fat head when I got to Natalie Dee’s site to catch up on the last couple days comics and low and behold there it was…a hot dog one.

Natalie has been reading my mothers email. I’m sure of it.

Mother’s email was a forward from one of her health nut cult members and in these exact words she claimed, “If you eat hot dogs your children and their children may get cancer.”

So this was still at trial in my brain as I moved on and then the comic sparked me to voice my opinion on the subject before the jury went to lunch. Doesn’t everything cause cancer these days? Cell phones, the air, red meat, aspertame, sugar itself, bathroom cleaner, fabric softener and on and on and on. I’m not defending hot dogs anymore than I would defend cigarettes and alcohol, I know they are all bad for you but holy hell people I do want to die in this century and now I have this hot dog thing hanging over my head. I can’t eat a hot dog for the sake of my kids? Well what the hell were the horsepill vitamins for nine months supposed to do?

Ugh.

My son cracked his molar today eating an almond. I’m just really pissed and the whole hot dog thing must have been the icing on the cake. I am already overwhelmed, I don’t need to stress if I should feed the kids cereal tomorrow, you know, in case it kills them.

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Oh Look! A Real Post!
September 17, 2008, 5:17 am
Filed under: Blips, happiness, humor, life, marriage, me

In bullets…

  • I’ve been painting for a family member. Paint fumes aren’t as fun as they used to be.
  • My son is not allowed to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in his lunch at school. Because someone else is allergic. I’m having a really hard time with this. It’s just odd.
  • Tonight eight minutes before midnight a Trooper called to discuss the accident my Step-father was in earlier. About four this afternoon. How did he know I was still up? Is that not odd?
  • I did a naughty thing. I entered a contest for a basket filled with adult toys (worth $1200) by writing a 500 word post including one of the toys. Yeah, I’m shocked at me too! I don’t know who won yet but I can at least check it off my list of things to do before I die.
  • Did you know I was impulsive and daring?
  • If I win Christmas is covered this year. Dildos for everyone!
  • Yes, I think I’m funny.
  • Hubby left for work tonight at eleven and came back in to tell me he had just heard someone playing Taps. Again, odd.
  • And it smells like horseshit outside. There isn’t a cow or a horse for miles.
  • Maybe a poopy truck wrecked on the highway.
  • I’ve been seriously considering a change in attire.
  • I’m in love with some new peep toe shoes I saw last weekend. But they just don’t go with jeans.
  • Or paint.
  • Why do ladies with large tummies insist on wearing skin tight clothes? I do not want to see your “pooch”. Nor do I want anyone to see mine.
  • Do you want to see mine? If I suck it in I give the appearance of a flat tummy.
  • Honest.
  • My mother woke Friday, the day of her birthday, because she thought someone blew in her ear.
  • She was alone.
  • Again, odd.
  • I had a dream about this guy recently and I can’t get it out of my head.
  • I wonder if anyone ever dreams about me.
  • I go to bed entirely too late.
  • And wake entirely too early.
  • Hubby was given another pill for his “backache”.
  • I just rolled my eyes.
  • My neighbor had a guy parked in front of her house and she asked him why he was sitting there and he said he was investigating a worker’s comp case.
  • She called the cops.
  • I’m still laughing.
  • Can you believe this stuff is all from the last week?
  • Tomorrow I have to clean my house.
  • I mean today.
  • I guess I should go to bed first.


You Got Something Better to Do?
September 15, 2008, 3:53 am
Filed under: Blips, life, photography

Go here and check out this site. I am fascinated with the boring monotony of everyday life and this site captures that!

Guess I’m not alone!



Put On Your Halo
September 10, 2008, 1:35 pm
Filed under: bloggers, blogging, help

I realize I don’t generate much traffic but if you happen to visit me click here and read about a fellow blogger who has been in a tragic accident with her husband.

Kim at Today’s Creative Blog is holding an auction with donated items to help raise money for the couple.

Isn’t that so very nice? So if you are so inclined maybe you could buy something for Grandma for Christmas over there and help a family of six out? I know I would be grateful!

Resume clicking now.



Bugs Bugs Bugs
September 4, 2008, 11:19 pm
Filed under: bugs, life, nature, outdoors, photography

My neighbor moved away last spring and a new one moved in. About May the milkweed started to come up on the side of his deck and even through the slates. I was so excited to see it come back this year, it had doubled at the very least! Then one day I walked out back and it was all ripped down and laying on the ground. I honestly could have cried. What about my butterflies?

I ran into my neighbor about a month later and I said, “Hey, what happened to the milkweed?” And he said it was ugly and was in awe because had come through cracks as well. “It was so ugly!” Then as an afterthought he asked me why I was asking him. It is his deck and grass after all. Well I explained, the lady that lived there before purposely planted it so that she could get specimens to take into her kindergarten class. It never came up so plentiful before this year and, uh, well, you ripped it down.  And I tried to laugh it off and say that there would be plenty of other places to look for the fat worms and I brushed it off.

But I was truly, not upset, but saddened.

Baby Pillar

Baby Pillar

Then last night we walked out back and found that it had come back and there were all kinds of bugs crawling around. Including my beloved Monarch worms and a chrysalis! I was delighted like a kid at Christmas. So I broke out the camera and gave them a moment of fame. I also captured a praying mantis and a lady bug, watch A Blog in Pictures to see those shots!



Explosions
September 1, 2008, 4:55 pm
Filed under: events, fun, happiness, life, me, photography

I love fireworks.

They should be a weekly event. Daily would take away from the anticipation. I look forward to these blasts in the sky for weeks. Weeks! I mean all year really, there are times say in December when I recall the boom and I countdown the months till I can see them again.

I sit as close to them as I can, I can’t hear anything but them. Not even the Oooohh from the patrons directly behind me. I like the colors, but it’s the noise and the way it rocks my insides. How my heart feels as if it’s going to leap from my chest. It’s powerful and magnificent.

I can’t wait till next time!

*Visit A Blog in Pictures <———- for more photos over the next couple of days!